Actually, Why Not Transfer Settlers Out of Israel?
"Transfer" is back in vogue. The list of its enthusiasts is growing by the minute. So perhaps the time has come to discuss it with an open mind, with a willingness to change antiquated viewpoints, and with a slightly more contemporary vision of Israel and its future.
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For some reason, most of those who deal with the concept insist on discussing only one type of transfer: the one that displaces Arabs from their homes and sends them all to hell. But this is a rather problematic idea, involving lawsuits, international censure, red tape and the need to use a level of physical pressure that is absolutely not moderate.
But use a little creativity, and you'll find, just like that, eminently transferable human material right under our noses, the transfer of which will not require anyone to leave their home, to move from where they are, to transport their belongings or to perform any activity involving motion.
Settlers celebrating in the West Bank.Credit: Yaron Kaminsky
This is a transfer that has only advantages, and not a single disadvantage. It will be greeted by the entire world with thunderous applause, it will raise Israel's standing among the nations, restore its former glory as a (more or less) democratic state (plus or minus), and doubtless also cause the shekel to appreciate against major currencies and the Tel Aviv Stock Exchange to soar.
In addition to all its other virtues, this transfer is easy, and it could be effected within days, hours or maybe even minutes. That is because the candidates for transfer, all of them, with their wives and their little ones, their flocks and their rifles, are already abroad.
That is, they only need to be officially informed that from now on they are abroad. Of course the border agents must also be briefed that from now on, the Green Line is the eastern border of the State of Israel, and that's that – the transfer has been done.
Israeli security forces evacuating settlers.Credit: Nir Kafri / Archive
Ah, I forgot the most important part: The transfer announcement must also make clear to the transferees that from now on, any request they submit to "make aliyah" to Israel will be met with a polite refusal. It will be explained to them that they are not considered Jews according to the new criteria, but rather members of the Sicarii religion, which is not on the list of the religious denominations that are recognized in Israeli law.
The astute reader already understands who is meant: the settler population, of course. The reasons that make this transfer such an important, beneficial and healthy act are also quite clear. After all, a sovereign and almost sane state need not tolerate within itself, nor bear the expenses of maintaining, a racist, idolatrous and spurious Sabbatean sect that does not hide its ambition to undermine the foundations of the state and replace them with "sacred" nonsense from the Middle Bronze Age.
The exploits of this sect in the last year (sharp-eyed observers took notice of this already a generation ago) suffice to prove that it is a malignant hazard that endangers the existence, mental health and values of the state, much more than all of its external enemies.
Israeli settlers damaging Palestinian olive trees. Credit: Ayed Mazalom / Rabbis for Human Rights
They are to Israel exactly as Hamas and the Muslim Brotherhood are to Egypt, as the ayatollahs are to Iran, as Hezbollah is to Lebanon, as the Taliban is to Afghanistan and as the Christian evangelicals will soon be to the United States. They are gangs of messianic religious fanatics, violent and unbridled, who are convinced that their strange God speaks from their throats, that they are elevated above every people and that everything is allowed in order to realize their caprices.
All of these must be stopped speedily and decisively, before they bring down on all of us the disaster they wish for.
And to the merciful Jews who will be caught up with worry for the fate of the transferred settlers, let us say: Not to worry. Soon after their messiah disappoints them they will convert to Islam, convert to Christianity or recover. So it was after Shabbetai Zvi, so it will be after Yehuda Zvi.